5 Reasons People Don’t Live Their Purpose, Part 4: Fear

Welcome to part four of my five part series on why people don’t take the steps to live their highest purpose! So far I’ve covered lack of clarity on what they are passionate about, the idea that they don’t have the time or can make the commitment, and money concerns. Today I’d like to address that big looming specter called Fear.

Fear stops so many people in their tracks before they even get started. Taking a step in a new direction brings up many images in our minds of “what if…”.

Do any of these sound familiar?
“What if I fail?”
“What if I’m successful and my friends/family don’t like me anymore?”
“What if I make a fool out of myself?”
“What if I loose everything?”
“What will my friends/family think of me if I do this?”
“Who am I to be doing this?”
“What if I can’t support my family and we all starve?”

You start to convince yourself that maybe it’s better not to rock the boat. Just stay where it’s safe and familiar, even if that familiar place is sucking the life out of you.

The voice of fear is your small self, wanting to stay safe. You many have heard the acronym for fear–False Evidence Appearing Real. (I’ve also heard it as Forget Everything And Run!) Fear is the opposite of love. All of the contracted feelings we have stem from fear.

But ask yourself this: Do you really want to get to the end of your life never having done what you really wanted to do, never having lived to your full potential, never having really loved your life, felt truly alive and shared your special gifts with the world? What if you did move past fear and into a life you loved?

Start flipping the “what ifs” to a positive possibility. “What if I can do this?” “What if I’m successful and my family and friends are so proud of me?” “What if what I offer truly helps people (the environment, animals)?” “What if by doing what I love I actually make more money than I do now?” How does that feel? Really allow yourself to get into the feeling of success and all the good things you might expect by doing what you love. Feel it in your body. If it is your calling, opportunities will show up if you keep going. What you choose to focus on expands. Where are you placing your focus?

When you let fear stop you, you rob not only yourself, but others who may have benefited from your unique gifts that are your purpose for being here. As I discussed in the article on money, you don’t have to do it all at once. You can ease into a change at a pace that feels good to you. Just keep moving forward. Keep your vision out in front of you and find ways to express your purpose where you are right now. It may be that you don’t have to make big changes to shift into being more on purpose. Erasing fear

When you want to move in the direction of more growth and aliveness by following your highest calling, it can in fact cause resistance on the part of often well meaning family or friends. Realize that others act as a mirror of our own doubts and fears so that we can see them and release them. It can actually strengthen your resolve to have some resistance from others. Once you have confidence and belief in yourself, you will see that mirrored back to you. This is your life and only you know what is best for you. Only you can live it! Don’t wait for permission from anyone to do what you want to do. Taking action toward what you want can be empowering and increase your sense of aliveness. It dispels fear and gets energy flowing.

Another way to deal with fear is to not identify yourself with it. You are not your fear. Rather than say “I am afraid”, take a deep breath, let it out slowly and say, “The feeling of fear is moving through me.” Then see it as a mist passing through you and away.

You can have what you want. If you feel the desire to do or be something, you have what it takes to make it happen. Shift the fear into excitement and begin.