You are stronger than you think…

Just like the picture, finding your strength and realising your attributes are found through the struggles and the pain in life. Not when things are easy and you FEEL you are at your strongest. It is through the weak moments that you learn and become stronger because of those circumstances. A bag of Tea may look exactly the same as every other teabag in the box and you can make your judgements and assume which is the strongest, but you will never know or understand until it is placed in the hot water and you experience it and taste it for yourself. In the same way your expectations of yourself and your limits may lye in a specific place in your mind, and you may think you know exactly how strong you are and what you can and cannot deal with, but again it is through a whirlwind of intense change that your perspective and perceptions on yourself are really tested and you can be met with great surprise.

Our level of strength can always come as a shock when we are tested with difficult situations, such as; losing loved ones, losing jobs, experiencing divorce, breakups and many more. You may have an encouraging realisation that you are a lot stronger than you first thought when it came down to the punch. Or on the other hand may be disappointed that you weren’t as strong as you first though. But In ANY circumstance no matter the depth we CAN determine our strength through our response to the situation and the steps we make after the situations take place. No one was born emotionally stronger than another, it is through experiences and decisions of learning and growing that makes the difference. Through a time where weakness feels highlighted and we feel that we are helpless there ARE a lot of things we can do to flip the outcome around. A lot of what makes us who we are and what determines our character is the perception in which we see ourselves, and what we focus on. If we focus on our weaknesses we will see weakness. If we focus on our strength we will see strength. It is a fact that what You focus your eyes on THAT IS WHAT YOU WILL SEE!

In the analogy I have used before but evermore remains a strong example and relevant to this subject is how diamonds are formed. The concept that they first start from an unpleasant, dark uneven piece of coal relates to how we feel in the beginning of a crisis. But coal can ONLY be transformed into diamonds within an environment of extreme temperatures, combined with extreme atmospheric pressure, so without the crisis and pressures we come up against how else can we be made into a stronger version of ourselves? These extreme circumstances of the transition from coal into diamond cause explosions of magma at the speed of an un-corked Champagne bottle and vastly more powerful than that of most volcanoes. It involves heating up, cooling down, strong forces and intense pressure. But when the diamonds are finally formed, they are more complex in structure, they are much stronger than they were ever before and will no longer disintegrate under pressure because of the circumstances they were exposed to. They are noticeably beautiful and their immense strength is clearly displayed. The outcome was worth the process.

(to read more on how this process happens read The Naked Divorce Book or see more on www.nakeddivorce.com)

In the same way that coal is transformed into a diamond under pressure, it is possible for humans who feel under pressure from a life change they are going through, to be transformed, provided they have something which supports them in being contained during the change.

But the support you have is determined by you. You might have people around you that want to help; you can allow them in or you can shut them out. Or you might not have people around you that want to help, but you can look for people or groups to help or you can do nothing. It is our choice to take the steps in the direction we need to go. You can allow yourself to wither out and be defeated by your circumstance or you can rise above and crush your problems that tried to hold you under. In the midst of a struggle you come up against whatever it may be, you can find that you have untapped strength that waits for you to allow it to show. It may be lying dormant but doesn’t change that it is there… Through unexpected bumps your heart can jump into the opportunities for breakthrough to occur in abundance.

And so i say with confidence, if you make a choice to see those opportunities in which your strength CAN be displayed you will be surprised in how much stronger you are than you ever thought possible. It may take some moulding and shaping, some pressure and some solid heat but if you allow its course to take place you will be shaped into that diamond that is doubled in its worth.

Till next time!

Lots of hugs,
Adele